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Coming Out As Gay – What’s Wrong With The Community?

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The MATTER is one of fairness and justice: Everyone should be treated equally, regardless of race, age, gender — or sexual orientation. Everyone should have the same right to apply for a job or to rent an apartment without fear of discrimination. Yet gays and lesbians do not have that right under some state laws.

So you’re a gay, lesbian, bisexual, or transgendered teen, and you haven’t told anybody yet. It’s okay, really – being LGBT is great. And, admit it, the closet isn’t always a good place to be. We can all become better people through unity. Becoming a member of the gay rights movements will also help you discover and acknowledge the underlying foundation of your personality and sexuality. Nothing is more important than being positive of your sexuality. Before expecting others to do so, learn to accept yourself – if you are not comfortable with the idea of being publicly gay, bisexual or lesbian, and then think about it thoroughly. Not everyone is ready to let go of old prejudices, but by coming out and being a visible member of the community, you’re making a difference in creating social change and acceptance. Although others may initially feel uncomfortable or awkward with your disclosure, the happiest and most authentic life is only possible if you are open with those around you. Though you can’t totally live out a life without having haters around you but the thing is being gay or straight is just the same; there will also be haters.

Our family and friends mean the world to us and sometimes are our world. When we’re in the closet, those relationships can seem so fragile, especially when we’re not sure what their reaction will be to our sexual identity. The fear of rejection is very real. Even the fear of discrimination and bullying is more apparent these days. No one wants to lose loved ones, so coming out of the closet may not seem worth the risk. Oftentimes, we focus so much on what we may lose by coming out that we forget about what we may gain: Openness and freedom to finally express ourselves openly. Many out gay men can attest that coming out was worth the risk.

Depending on your environment, you may come across extremes of rejection and discrimination; it is important that you are prepared for potentially difficult times. Make sure that you are safe and ready before you take the leap. The whole community does not need to know unless you are comfortable in coming totally out, and are safe and independent enough to do so. Gay bullying might be another subject that you have to deal with when you come out and reveal your inner identity. Unfortunately, you may be in a situation where you are dependent on someone or something that might potentially change if you come out; in a situation like this, you may need to change what it is you are dependent on before you come out. This may mean waiting until you have a home of your own, or in an area of safety where you do not run the risk of being outlawed or disowned.

Be proud of who you are! Hold your head up high and don’t let anyone make you feel ashamed. Don’t apologize or allow yourself to feel ashamed of it to anyone when you tell them the truth about yourself. Learn to not care what people say or do; allowing anyone to take a position that has you apologizing or feeling bad about your gay sexuality will only reinforce any negative preconceptions they have. Instead, be positive and firm in that happy outlook so that anyone who seems disappointed or sad about it will know that you are fine and happy. This is really important to show to those who love you – we all have a hard time imagining that anyone could be happy doing things that we ourselves might not be interested in doing; just as people who are happy rock climbing have a hard time understanding people who are happy sleeping in a hammock on their days off, straight people have a hard time understanding how a gay person can be happy. All you need to do is to assure them that you are.

Make sure you are certain of yourself first. There is no rush on your sexuality – no time limit. Take your time to be certain before you shout your pride from the rooftops. Coming out once is hard enough, and the more times you “come out” to people the easier it is. Don’t be defined by a label. You can choose what you call yourself, but remember that labels are superficial things that humans make up to categorize.

Joining the gay movement with a “no hate campaign” slogan and seeing its members in the clubs will definitely help you come out and develop as a better person.

Only you can say who you are. Never be afraid to be yourself.

Don’t forget to check out and become a new pledge today.

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